Bob finally signs

Katrien is sitting underneath her desk and whispering on the telephone ‘ Roly , Bob’s all signed up now but we’ve got a Really Big Problem ‘ Roland : Mon petit chou , what is it ?
‘He’s asked to meet the squad and after all the ones we sold and sacked we’ve only got 3 players left and that’s including the little one who we can’t sell yet because the fans say he’s better than Bryan Ferry’
Roland ,slurring from a noisy Belgian bar ‘Liebling , as the great Belgian comic , Groucho Marx , said- any club that would want me as a member is not a club I would want to join – tra la la ……..
Katrien hangs up in frustration – what to do ? Bob is waiting next door .
She phones Ben Kensall ‘ Ben how many security men and car park attendants are working today. Ben ‘About 8 ‘
Is there anyone else around ‘ Well Richard Murray’s here . OK here’s the plan , get them all down to the ( massively overpriced and globally exploitative ) Nike shop and kit them out with full club strips , grab a minibus and take them up Sparrows Lane and get them to jog about like they are players .
‘Boss are you kidding some of these guys are 17 or 18 stone and Richard Murrays got to be 60 if he’s a day.’
No problem , Ive got that covered , I’ll tell Bob that its the close season and in England , a lot of the players let themselves go a bit over the summer – its all those chips and pies the English eat ‘ -OK but what about Richard’ – that’s easy , just tell Bob that he’s an exciting young prospect from the Andorran 9th division , who scored 353 goals last year and Roland was only able to pick him up cheap because of a premature ageing problem .

Katrien relaxes into her chair ‘phew , another bullet dodged there’.
Damn I forgot to give Roland the good news about the cost savings programme , Ben Roberts called to say that now Yoho is coming back we’ve been able to cancel the order for goalkeeping gloves , apparently Ben says that the arms are the only part of Yoho’s body he doesn’t use as a goalie …………………………

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