Mrs Albury ‘What are you doing in there , hurry up or you will miss the beautiful sunset on the balcony’
Just coming dear , dusting off my flip flops , be there in a jiffy.
Picture the scene , its August 31st , a romantic hillside hotel , a spectacular sunset and there I am inside the room frantically pressing the refresh button on newsnow Charlton for the 450th time that hour to see if weve bought anyone , loaned anyone or frankly even thought about doing a deal with anyone or anything.
Having missed the sunset , dinner progresses on similar lines whilst I flick pieces of Greek Salad dressing all over my infeasibly difficult to operate and utterly useless Blackberry, cunningly hidden in my napkin. The wife opposite me is talking about something , but frankly who knows what because my mind is elsewhere . She tells me that there is a hornet the size of a small mammal crawling up the legs of my Vivien Westwood shorts.
But I am lost , someone on Charlton Life has seen Darren Bent arriving at Sparrows Lane – maybe he will, maybe he won’t , could it be , maybe it is , maybe it isn’t.
What was that dear ,do I want Reg Snapper as the main course who ?? , no , no its Darren ,you don’t understand, he’s coming home